Experience taught me a lot.

       Sometimes, there's a time when I sit in a quiet place alone, without any disturbance of the people, chaotic life, and hustle and bustle city just to find the real myself and thinking about life. Yes life. You never know how hard life can be. Well, after all these problems that I've faced before and maybe I will face it in the future actually really wake me up to realize what should I do, what I shouldn't do. I'm actually trying to find someone to share all the pains through mentally not by physically but mentally. I was thinking "Is there going to be somebody with me to hear all my problems? Or maybe someone can heal the pain by share their happiness with me?" all these actually lingered in my mind. I hide all the pains, the problems from all my family and friends. I don't want them to be involved to unnecessary and not important things in their life. Especially when it's all about myself. That is why, I try to keep it all by myself. There's one of my friends said that I can share all the problems with her but I'm afraid. Too afraid to do that perhaps I'm not ready and maybe I'm not sure whether that person can keep the secret or not. Sometimes, I cried in my sleep, when I woke up in the morning there will be no one noticing that I was crying all night long. Sometimes, I just go somewhere else that I can calm myself. In this world, yeah it's all about money, you need money to live because you need food to eat, and all sort of things. When you have a friend he/she doesn't understand how you really survive to live with money and that money you really need for something more important and that friend is your bestfriend. There you go, stuck between two places. Then again, you'll say that this world is cruel. Yes, this world is cruel. Indeed. You're the one who will decide whether you want it to be easy or hard. The choice is in your hand. Have a good day. Xx